Aloneness vs Loneliness Abroad: Master the art of expat life

Heading off to a new country feels a bit like jumping into a giant cake—exciting, a tad messy, and full of surprises. Within this confectionery metaphor of expat life, there’s a fine line between savoring a slice of cake on your own and feeling like the cake’s eaten you—this is where aloneness and loneliness come into play. Let’s dive into how to master the art of enjoying your own company and keep the expat blues at bay.

Aloneness: Your Solo Party

Think of aloneness as throwing a solo party where you’re both the guest of honor and the DJ. It’s about turning up the music (literally or metaphorically) and dancing through your new life abroad with confidence and a dash of flair. Aloneness is your ticket to:

• Explore freely: Ever wanted to visit a museum, only to be rushed by a companion? Now’s your chance to read every plaque.
• Discover new hobbies: That salsa class? That art workshop? Go for it. It’s time to do things just because they make you happy.
• Relish in self-discovery: Use this time to check in with yourself, your goals, and dreams. Journal, meditate, or simply daydream at a café.

Loneliness: The Uninvited Party Crasher

Loneliness is like that party crasher who turns up uninvited, dampening the mood. It sneaks up in moments of quiet or amidst a crowd, whispering tales of disconnect. But here’s the twist: loneliness can be a nudge towards:

• Making new connections: Feeling lonely? It might be the universe’s way of saying, “Hey, time to meet some new folks.”
• Reaching out: Send a message to an old friend or make plans with a new acquaintance. Sometimes, a little initiative is all it takes.
• Creating your tribe: Join clubs, volunteer, or start a meetup group. Your future bestie could be just one shared interest away.

Striking the Balance

Dancing between the joy of aloneness and navigating the waves of loneliness involves a bit of grace and a lot of humor. Here are some top tips to keep the balance:

• Embrace the ‘me’ dates: Treat yourself to dates doing things you love. It’s about making awesome memories solo.
• Open up: Share your feelings with friends, family, or fellow expats. Sometimes, just knowing you’re not alone in feeling lonely can be a huge comfort.
• Get social, but stay true: While it’s great to branch out, don’t feel pressured to fit into every group. Find your tribe, even if it’s just one or two people who really get you.

Remember, every expat life journey is a unique mix of highs, lows, solos, and ensemble pieces. Whether you’re reveling in your splendid solitude or seeking out soulmates in your new locale, there’s beauty in every bit of the journey. So, here’s to mastering the art of being alone without feeling lonely, to making every moment (even the not-so-great ones) count, and to finding joy in the vast, beautiful cake that is expat life. Bon appétit!